Helpful-Responses

Read the attachments and Then write a 100 word helpful and positive response to the students work. State how you agree with them and give your opinion about the essay.

1) I could not conclude from the paragraph that spectator sports encourage fans to act in abnormal ways. Pooja Vaidya concluded that for many Eagles fans, the atmosphere of a game could cause them to act abnormally to their usual behavior. This is supported by describing the Eagles fans, sitting shirtless in the freezing cold weather just to show off their painted chests saying Eagles. Pooja also supported this by describing the man who begged on his knees for the team to catch up with the Cowboys, which led other spectators to ask for his autograph. This is all abnormal behavior. If they wanted to add additional evidence, they could have interviewed an Eagles fan who goes to games often, though I don’t think this would add more than what is already working on the paragraph. The conclusion is a solid wrap-up to the paragraph and what it argues.

I think the inductive leap made by Pooja is a perfectly rational leap. She does this after making a very well put together inductive argument. The paragraph has a ton of viable evidence about her argument, all of which support her distinct conclusion. She describes the men at the Eagles game in great detail and provides a lot of imagery to what she experienced and inferred in the moment. This also gives a biased, first-hand description of the setting of the game and how the people acted leading to her conclusion that Eagles fans tend to act abnormally to their usual behaviors at an Eagles game.

2) In the following paragraph about a football game between the Dallas Cowboys and the Philadelphia Eagles, Pooja Vaidya discusses the abnormal behavior of many Eagles fans. I could not conclude that spectator sports are the reason for the fans to act in abnormal behavior. After a day spent at the football game, Vaidya concludes that football games are an opportunity for Eagles fans to engage in this type of behavior. The writer’s evidence consist of observations made of Eagles fans. For example, Vaidya examines the behavior of one fan with a face painted green and a cape with an E on it. He expresses that the fan “ran up and down the aisles and led cheers…when the team fell behind, the fan fell on his knees, cried, and begged.” Vaidya recalls this experience because it stood out and emphasizes the dramatic behavior of a particular Eagles fan to support his argument. Furthermore, Vaidya discusses that many fans had their shirts off while it was below freezing. This piece of evidence shows the dedication of many Eagles fans, which may seem bizarre or illogical considering the weather conditions. Additionally, Vaidya provides evidence that revolves around violence to emphasize many fans abnormal behavior such as fights breaking out in the stadium. Another example of this is when a Dallas fan was very threatened by other Eagles fans that “police had to escort the Dallas fan out of the stands for his own protection.” Both examples of violence strengthen Vaidya’s argument because they portray the actions of the people around him as unusual because it stems from a sport.

Vaidya provides many convincing examples, which justify her inductive leap. I think the Inductive argument does make some strong points because most of the behaviors are outrageous. The writer’s argument draws inferences from the evidence, which reach a clear conclusion and stance. Ultimately, the paragraph does contain descriptive details that portray the Eagles fans’ behavior as abnormal, which strengthen the writer’s conclusion.

3)I think after reading the inductive paragraph about the Eagles versus Cowboys game, I could not conclude that all eagles fans act in outrageous ways when they are attending a game. The reason being is this fan only witnessed certain situations. I’m sure there were and are some fans at NFL football games behaving in a normal manor it just happens that the fans this particular person witnessed were extremely into the game. I also would not conclude that spectator sports encourage fans to act in abnormal ways. The reason I would not conclude this is because no one on or off the field of sporting events encourages crazy, weird or violent behavior. None of the players want any of the fans hurt regardless if they are rooting for the opposing team. The conclusion is basically stating that a day at the Eagles stadium is always crazy and violent and that Eagles fans are out of control. I don’t think there is enough evidence to support that. Fans are dedicated to their team, but what about their normal jobs, you would never know that they dress up on Sunday’s at the Eagles games.

I think the writer could have provided instances that Eagle fans were acting normal just rooting for their favorite team. It would show the reader that not every single fan in that Eagles stadium was acting crazy and irrational. I do think the leap that the writer took for the conclusion is too far. Grouping all the Eagles fans together stating that they are all crazy and abnormal is a far stretch. There were some fans that the writer described as just having their favorite players jerseys on. That isn’t acting crazy or abnormal, it’s just supporting their favorite team. I think to a certain extent it makes it good inductive argument; there are some crazy fans out there. However, I do think it’s a far reach to group them all together and call them abnormal.

4) Pooja Vaidya has written an essay about her experience attending a Philadelphia Eagle’s football game and observing the behavior of the fans. It offers detailed descriptions of what she saw and experienced on one day as she “learned a little bit about football and a lot about the behavior of football fans.” Her approach, using inductive reasoning, can be described with this syllogism:

Major Premise: Many football fans behave in strange ways.

Minor Premise 1: Eagles football fans paint their face and bodies, dress up in team colors, capes and wigs.

Minor Premise 2: Eagle’s fans sing, cry, pray, to show support for their team.

Minor Premise 3: Eagle’s fans drink before and during the game, leading to fights in the stadium.

Conclusion: A day at the stadium is an opportunity to engage in behavior that in any other context would be unacceptable and even abnormal.

The essay provides insufficient evidence. She infers that many football fans act in unacceptable and abnormal ways on game days. First, how do we know that the people she observed behave this way only on game days? Many people drink too much, and not just on game day. Second, there is a lack of supporting data to support the major premise that the behavior is unacceptable, such as wearing a t-shirt with the colors or name of your favorite team. It sounds like she is attending her first football game. She is an observer, not an expert. To strengthen the essay, she could add information from football fans to support the premise.

Vaidya provides excellent first hand data to describe this behavior. Fans paint their faces and bodies with team colors, running up and down wearing capes. Some fans go shirtless in freezing temperatures to paint their body with Eagles colors and letters. There is a lot of drinking; fans are observed drinking at tailgate parties before the game, and continue drinking in the stadium. When the team is behind, fans cry and beg others to support the team. Fans are hostile and threatening to fans of the opposing team, to the point that police are used to protect a fans of the opposing team who sat in the wrong place. Unfortunately, Vaidya bases the conclusion on personal experience from one game. It would be more effective if there were some expert quotes, or if she had interviewed the friend who took her to the game to ask “Does this happen every game?” I think because not all of the behaviors are necessarily abnormal, they cannot be shown to be specific to game day and that the author is “learning about football,” make the conclusion weak.

 

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